Current mood:calm
Out of nowhere, thoughts come into my head, like a conversation between two people, I think things over in my head, and my ideas and understandings are revised. Time and time again, as I work through things in my mind, I get these realizations, where I understand something just a little bit better, or something I have been wondering about all of a sudden makes perfect sense. Just yesterday I was thinking about religion, and how I used to look at it, and how it was the wrong way to look at it. From my point of view it was passed down to me by family and church as this set of rules, things that I could and could not do. It also included many things that I had to do if I wanted to be a Christian. I get the feeling that I am not the only one who had that idea. Now I have a totally different perspective, and I was thinking about how I had viewed religion in the past, and I realized that was not at all what it was suppose to be. Now I know it is about having a relationship with God, that is where it begins, that is where it always seems to begin. Here is a fragment of my thoughts as I jotted them down:
Its not the rules, the rules have nothing to do with it, my perspective changes, my desires change, and I just end up doing what I am impressed is the right thing to do. It just so happens that the rules are going along with what I am finding is right. But I have thrown away the rules, walked up to God, and asked him to guide me, that is the only way for me to go. To throw away these sick twisted dirty rags tainted by man’s hands, and to start over with God. I do not want a relationship with rules, I want a relationship with God. Do not let the rules of a given religion or the ways of man taint your view of God, who is perfect and good.
Now I must comment on that, I have held onto many rules, but only the ones where it says in the bible that God gave them to man. I am not saying that I did not break some of them, because I have, I am far from perfect. What I am saying is that it is a relationship with God which is the beginning, that is where we need to start. Following the rules does not come first, they are only a symptom of loving God and developing a relationship with Him. I do not follow any of these rules because I have to, I choose to follow rules because they are good and right, and I want to follow them.
Also, when I say “I have thrown away the rules”, I am meaning all of the rules put together by various members of the Christian religion that I believe have deviated from God’s good rules and plans he has laid out for us. I am now moving forward with a sincere interest in searching out God’s plans for us, and the guides he has laid out. Just as people have done in the bible, I am searching out his decrees and precepts.